Thursday 19 June 2008

Bianca comes runnin' out of 'er 'ouse, right, as she 'as no idea where 'er kids are (as usual), right? Jase is frantic and shouts for Jay and is relived wen 'e comes runnin'. Up the apples and pears, in the bedroom, Dorn is dazed and don't answer 'er dog and bone wen Jase calls 'er. Mickey wakes up and Dorn tells 'im they 'ave ter get out, May 'as torched the house, but she can't ball of chalk on 'er ankle. Mickey tries ter open the window, and dahn the apples and pears, Keiff sighs that the windows are painted shut. Jase goes ter 'ave a look for a ladder, but 'is is chained ter the bloody van, right, and the bloody key is inside the burnin' 'ouse. Mickey smashes the bloody window but smoke is comin' into the bleedin' bedroom from the bloody apples and pears. Dorn is sittin' and wailin' pointlessly and unhelpfully over 'er baby, do wot guvnor! The bloomin' smoke gets worse, and Mickey is unconscious again. Jase persuades Dorn ter ffrow the baby out of the bloody window. He cotches it successfully [luckily for 'im, he'd 'ave never 'eard the end of it if 'e'd dropped it]. Ricky finds all Bianca's children messing in the cellar of the bloody Vic, where Witney (the teenager) is drinkin' some (nicked) alcopop. Mrs Masood is furious that Keiff's dog 'as left a large dog turd in the middle of 'er livin' room, right, as Keiff 'as left it locked in the house wile 'e were at the chuffin' pub. She says that she wants Keiff and 'is dog out of the bloomin' house, and she will 'ave ter get rid of the rug, right, and the sofa and curtains wen they leave the house. Her ole man makes a Nanny Goat Race as if 'e is used ter this. She goes ter put all Keiff’s bags outside, right, and notices the fire, and panics (as she 'as a phobia about fire). She is irrational and frantic as she refuses ter let 'er family go ter wotch or 'elp. However, right, her kids sneak out. Mr Masood asks if she 'as ever told the kids the bloody 'oole story about 'er fire in Pakistan. Outside the bloody Millers' 'ouse, right, Vinnie gets the bleedin' flag ter use as a soft landin' and Dorn shoves an unconscious Mickey out of the chuffin' window and the assorted men 'oldin' the chuffin' flag cotch 'im wiv probably no furffer damage. However, wen they shout for Dorn ter jump, she is already unconscious. The bloomin' fire engine can't cop ffrough because of a traffic jam, and Vinnie prevents Jase from runnin' into the burnin' buildin' ter rescue Dorn. Meanwile, right, Keiff sneaks past and goes ter rescue 'er, and carries 'er out successfully, right? Evry geezer 'ave a looks as the ambulance arrives and the bloody men put oxygen masks on Dorn and Keiff. At the bleedin' club, they can't 'ear the commotion, and the knees-up continues. Abi singgs an ole song wich were 'er favver's favourite, and Jack says it's an orful chick song, wich makes Abi run oray and sulk yet again. Jack finds 'er and apologises and tells 'er about 'is daughter and 'ow 'e feels bein' separated from 'er. Later, Abi nicks Tanya's dog and bone to text 'er favver. Tanya asks Jack wot 'e told Abi ter cheer 'er up, and Jack tells Tanya that it's a secret and 'e wants ter hear 'ers first. They smile and seem 'appy togeffer, init? At 'ospital, the chuffin' Millers are all not so bad, right, chattin' oray wiv sooty faces and oxygen masks 'round their necks. Mickey is gahn for 'is Michael Caine scan and Darren says "they won't find anyfink 'ehe." Jase brings Summer hammer and tack and Dorn says "don't worry mummy's 'ere" [ironically, given the fact that she 'as failed ter protect the baby from anyfink at all in 'er first year]. Keiff says May is dead