Friday 11 July 2008

At the bloomin' fairground near the chuffin' beach, Sean rabbit and porks ter Roxy, right, tells 'er ter put the mockers on drinkin', she could be damagin' the baby. She says she don't care, right, and they argue a bit, right, and a man comes over ter ask if she is Not so bad. Sean tells 'im ter mind 'is own business, and Roxy says she don't know Sean, and yes, he is bovverin' 'er. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? The man steps up and wen 'e grabs Sean, Sean kicks 'is legs out and dumps 'im on the sand, and repeats 'is freat. Roxy 'as taken this opportunity ter run off. Peggy goes ter collect 'er whistle and flutecase, wich the bobbies 'ave recovered. Sean finds Roxy and 'e says yes, he's not favver of the year material, and yes, right, he 'as been a mess but now 'e knows wot 'e wants, but they are alike, they 'ave boff been 'round the chuffin' block, made mistakes, right, been 'urt, right, this baby could be a 'oole new start, right, put the bloody mistakes behind them, the bloomin' two of them. She is sceptical and she says 'e right believes that - but 'e don't want 'er, all 'e wants is the baby. She walks off and 'e calls after 'er that 'e luvs 'er. They rabbit and pork and she says if she were sure about 'im .., init?Sean says sincerely that she can be sure, he luvs 'er, and does she feel anyfink for 'im at all, then, eh, mate? She kisses 'im briefly and unenffusiastically, and says that's it, right, how she feels. He sighs. Ronnie goes ter pack Roxy's kit and 'er favver starts ter try persuadin' 'er that she is makin' a mistake, and she says 'e is manipulatin' Roxy, and 'e is buyin' Roxy. He says 'e is sharin' 'is wealff, right, he wants to. He says that after 'is illness, he 'ave a looks at it differently, the chuffin' brass don't matter, and 'e wants ter help out where 'e can, do wot guvnor! Ronnie say no, right, he just wants ter take Roxy oray from 'er, and 'e tells 'er that she ain't 'appy, right, ffese men, Jack, etc, sounds like a mess, and 'er career ain't right gahn anywhere, she is just usin' Roxy ter fill the bloomin' hole in 'er life. Yer can't 'ave a knees-up wivout a joanna. Ronnie says, yes, that 'ole is 'is fault - the baby that 'e made 'er give over, init?He says it were the right fin', she weren't ole enough at 14 ter have a baby. Then 'e says 'e didn't force 'er ter sign the paper, she 'ad the choice, Nanny Goat Race it, she made the bloody wrong decision, init?Ronnie says she were 14 and 'e told 'er it were the right fin' ter do, right, and if she did, he would 'ave a look after 'er, right, luv 'er, right, but then after she 'ad, he ignored 'er, as soon as she were ole enough ter have a mind of 'er own, right, he 'ated 'er. He says angrily that she were selfish, callous, she used ter be 'is wee girl, dote on 'im and then she suddenly turned 13 and were interested in fellas and all 'er attention went ter some spotty kid, right, and she got 'erself pregnant. Ronnie rants about 'ow she called the adoption agency but they couldn't tell 'er anyfink, right, and 'ow she dreams about the baby, right, and the child. She says all that were 'is fault. Archie says if she 'ad said she were sorry, right, admitted it were a mistake, shown respect ter him, right, it could 'ave been different. He repeats insistently, say sorry, right, now, right, go on. She leaves, right, and Archie says oh, by the way don't bovver ter 'ave a look for 'er, she died 13 years ago. Ronnie turns hammer and tack and says 'e's lyin', why didn't 'e tell 'er before. He says she spit in 'is Nanny Goat Race, he wouldn't tell a nasty, right, spiteful girl like yer about a baby she didn't even want, that she gave oray. Archie says the chuffin' family called ter tell 'er, because they fought the bloody birff muvver should be at the funeral, but 'e didn't tell 'er. So, she can forget 'er paffetic maudlin fantasy about the daughter she disposed of, she is dead and buried, rottin' and it's all Ronnie's fault. He snotches 'er locket wiv the picture of 'er baby. He says that's life's payback for Ronnie's vicious, selfish, neglect of 'er favver, do wot guvnor! She slaps 'im and 'e 'olds 'er dahn on the sofa wiv 'is 'ands round 'er neck, wiv 'is 'oole weight on 'er. He tells 'er that if she pushes 'er luck, right, he will finish 'er for right good, teach 'er a lesson once and for all. He gets up and she gasps and rubs 'er neck. Roxy walks in and asks woss gahn on, do wot guvnor! Ronnie 'as recovered and is sittin' on the chuffin' floor, right, 'ave a lookin' dishevelled. Archie frows a few notes at Ronnie on the bloody floor and says she said 'er taxi is waitin' outside. Roxy asks for a few minutes alone wiv Ronnie. Archie goes outside and spots Sean, waitin', and 'e introduces 'imself politely ter Archie, 'oo 'ave a looks 'im up and dahn and don't 'ave a look pleased. He tells Sean ter go ter an 'otel, on 'im, and shoves a wad of cash at 'im. Peggy arrives hammer and tack and Archie lies that Ronnie 'as shut 'im out and she is a disturbed bint. Peggy apologises for 'er part in it and says she will sort them out. Archie and Sean come hammer and tack in a few minutes later ter join them, and Archie acts right differently ter Ronnie, right, sayin' 'e wants ter be chinas. He asks them all ter stay the bleedin' night. Roxy asks Ronnie ter make up and she pretends to, right, but says she 'as ter leave now or she never will, do wot guvnor! She tells them she 'as decided ter give it a go wiv Sean. Archie 'ave a looks irritated but calls 'er 'is wee blonde angel, wich is wot 'e 'as said Ronnie were wen she were a child, and 'e 'ave a looks pointedly and Ronnie wen 'e says it. Ronnie pretends ter kiss 'is cheek, right, and wispers that she will kiss 'is gravestone wen 'e's dead. They 'ave a look nastily at each uvver. They all leave, and Ronnie sends off 'er taxi, right, as she is copping a lift wiv Sean. Archie makes a last ditch attempt ter get Peggy ter stay, askin' 'er ter share a bottle of champagne, right, and 'e goes on about them bein' ole enough that they can't werete time and 'e wants ter ask 'er wot 'e should 'ave 40 years ago. She 'ave a looks flattered and smiles flirtatiously, init?Ronnie and Roxy are wonderin' woss keepin' 'er, right, and wen they go ter ask, Peggy says she 'as decided ter stay a week or so wiv Archie, ffen "they" will come hammer and tack to Walford. Ronnie 'ave a looks 'orrified. Sean drives Roxy and Ronnie 'ome

Thursday 10 July 2008

Ronnie goes off in a strop and rants at Peggy that she 'as ter get Roxy out, right, she can't stay 'ere wiv 'er favver. Peggy says 'e were delighted wen 'e 'eard that Peggy were bringing Ronnie ter see 'im, and blokes change. Peggy goes ter ask Roxy ter come 'ome wiv Ronnie, and says they can leave because they came in 'er car and it's been nicked. I'll get out me spoons. Archie and Peggy chat wile Ronnie tries ter persuade Roxy ter come wiv 'er. Archie is upset that 'e 'asn't seen Ronnie for 15 years, and asks about 'er - sayin' that Roxy only tells 'im wot 'e wants ter hear. Archie persuades Roxy ter ask Ronnie ter stay there, since she is stuck there any road, and there's nowhere else nearby that's open, init?Roxy does, and says she is fed up wiv Ronnie cluckin' over 'er, right, and not lettin' 'er fink for 'erself. Roxy says she is stayin' 'ere, to 'ide from Sean. Ronnie says they found 'er, so Sean will too. Roxy says well, she came 'ere ter get oray from Ronnie too, she's fed up wiv bein' Ronnie's baby. Roxy says 'e 'as been a favver, 'ave a lookin' after 'er, and Ronnie could 'ave that too. Ronnie says no thanks, right, and sniffles a bit. Roxy tells 'er she can stay, right, wivout 'avin' ter talk ter Dad, right, ffen cop an early train back. Meanwile, right, Phil is wiv Susie Brannin' at the bloody salon where the men chasin' 'er are breakin' in, and they escape frough the back door ter Phil's car, init?The men give chase in their car. They drive round a corner and then Phil pulls 'is car out of an 'idden driveway. Susie thanks 'im and says "I'm all tingly." She asks 'im 'ow many business 'e owns and weffer 'e is divorced or gay. He says 'e is a widower, right, and she says she could cop to like 'im. She prattles on and on, right, and asks 'ow can she repay 'im? He asks 'er 'ow quick she could lose 'er voice. Phil and Susie arrive at the Vic and she says 'e owns a rub-a-dub - 'e must be rollin' in it. Phil asks 'er wot 'er ex is after, right, because 'e wants ter know wot 'e is up against if the ex comes after Susie. Phil finds a spare bedroom (Roxy's) and wen 'e comes ter say goodbye she opens the sheets up and asks 'im ter stay, as she 'asn't thanked 'im properly. Ronnie goes ter bed and Archie and Peggy 'ave some more wine in 'is 'uge lounge and chat about children and grandchildren. She says 'e's done well for 'imself. He says 'e invested in boozers and clubs and then sold up. He says it's only an 'ouse and 'e wanted 'is children, and 'e used ter ffink that the bloody only way 'e'd cop ffem 'ere were on 'is deaff-bed and 'e would die 'appy. Then 'e got cancer, right, and 'e never told the bloody girls because then 'e realised that they would only be there because they 'ad ter be, not because they wanted ter be. He and Peggy seem right cosy and flirtatious. Cor blimey guv! It's mornin', and Sean is in WeyNorth and South. It's 7:45 and Phi wakes up. Susie says 'e snores and is this room a shrine ter his dead trouble and strife, isit?Phil says no, right, it's 'is cousin's. Susie says she 'as ter get hammer and tack to 'er salon, right, it's probably been trashed, and she says life is just one big springy mattress and she's bouncin' out of 'is bed and leavin' now. Phil tells 'er goodbye and says 'e is worried about 'er alone, and Ben overhears and 'ave a looks out, right, ffen 'ides again. Ben wotches as Phil gets in the car wiv Susie ter take 'er 'ome. Yer can't 'ave a knees-up wivout a joanna. They 'ave a look at the mess and Phil asks wot this is right about. She runs in and 'ave a looks frough a pile of boxes of stationery and underneaff till rolls is an 'uge bag (couple of kilos) wich she puts in 'er oversized shoulder bag and goes ter sit at a bus put the mockers on. Roxy 'as gone into tahn and Ronnie follows 'er and Roxy says she is 'ome now, and is bein' 'ave a looked after - Dad is the bloomin' Mae West she 'as right now, right, and 'e could be there for Ronnie too. She says bye ter Ronnie and sits on a seaside fairground ride swiggin' vodka from an 'alf bottle. Sean is wanderin' 'round the same fair.

Tuesday 8 July 2008

Sean is mad as 'e asks Billy where Ronnie and Peggy 'ave gone, and smashes a glass then goes up the apples and pears and grabs 'oney's baby and tells Billy and 'oney that they 'ave ter tell 'im where they went, where Roxy is. After freatenin' ter ffrow the baby out of the window, and a bit of shoutin', right, Sean is amazed that the baby 'as fallen asleep in 'is arms and 'e 'ave a looks at it paternally, right, and mutters ter himself that Roxy can't do this ter him. I'll get out me spoons. Billy and 'oney 'ave no idea, and Sean says 'e is only in that state because she is keepin' 'im oray from 'is own baby. Billy says Sean should just 'ave said so and Sean says 'e assumed they already knew. Billy gets the address - it's only the bleedin' name of the tahn, right, WeyNorth and South [wich is a big tahn, and will be 'ard ter search! Blimey!] Billy is surprised wen Aunt Sal arrives ter keep an eye on 'im and 'oney. Billy wines ter Honey that Roxy didn't even trust 'im enough ter tell 'im about 'er pregnancy and now Peggy obviously 'ad second foughts about lettin' 'im run the bloody Vic. Phil goes ter Susie's address and the lass there says Susie left a monff ago ter sunny Portugal and asks wot Phil wants wiv 'er, right? He says it's 'is business. He calls Max, right, 'oo don't believe that 'is sister could be abroad. I'll get out me spoons. Phil says 'e'll try again, and goes hammer and tack to rabbit and pork ter the unhelpful cow, right, sayin' 'e is angry. The cow asks 'ow angry, and then says Not so bad, she's out the back frough the salon. She locks the door behind 'im and asks 'oo sent 'im. Phil breaks it dahn and then a man 'oo is after Susie attacks 'im, and after 'e deals wiv 'im, right, the cow smacks 'im wen 'e's not 'ave a lookin'. Susie phones Max, and after a short conversation, asks Phil for 'er brass. Wen Phil is about ter leave she grabs 'is car keys, and runs off ter a locked room. She tells 'im that she wants 'im ter take 'er ter Max. Phil says it were a favour for Max, he ain't Max's messenger. Then some more men arrive at the bleedin' salon door wiv the bloke Phil seen off earlier. Sean 'otwires a car and drives ter WeyNorth and South. Roxy is flouncin' 'round a right expensive-'ave a lookin' bedroom and a yung man appears wiv a drink (cocktail) for 'er as she is admirin' 'er (flat) stomach in the mirror. She says sumfink flirty ter him and 'e massages 'er hammer and tack as she lies on the bed. Then she gets a dog and bone call and says "yes, right, the gardener is still 'ere, workin' 'is wee socks off." She tells the man ter get hammer and tack to work, init?She wanders 'round the huge kitchen admirin' 'er waistline and cookin' food, init? Peggy wants Ronnie ter talk ter her, in detail. Peggy asks about 'er life and 'er child. Ronnie says she were Amy and she 'as no idea where she is. Peggy asks for more open communication from 'er, and says Ronnie is too cold and Ronnie says she don't want ter be like 'er and Roxy, let vile men do fings ter ffem - she knows wot Eric did, hit 'er all the bleedin' time. Peggy says Phil took the beatings for 'er, and the bloody two of them protected Grant and Sam, do wot guvnor! They wander onto the subject of Ronnie's favver, and Ronnie says Archie 'ad numerous affairs and that is why their muvver took a one-way trip ter Australia, right, and abandoned 'er and Roxy. She says she wished 'im dead then, and still does, she 'as never wanted any fairy dead more. Peggy can't believe that Archie were like that - she fought 'e were luvly. Wile they chat, a man puts 'is number on their table and tells Ronnie ter call 'im. They leave the cafe and find the bloody car missin', and call the bloomin' bobbies. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? Peggy suggests they call Roxy ter pick them up. Ronnie realises that Roxy is wiv some bloke, and Peggy says 'e is sposed ter be just wot she needs. Ronnie decides ter ffumb a lift, right, and the man 'oo left 'is number puts the mockers on for 'er. He makes a naughty comment and Peggy tells 'im ter wotch 'is North and South. The man asks Ronnie ter go out tonight after she 'as ditched the bloomin' old bird. Ronnie tells 'im ter pull over and they cop out and ball of chalk to the bleedin' large 'ouse and ringg the bloody doorbell. A man opens the door and clearly Peggy and Ronnie recognise 'im, and 'e tells Ronnie "Happy Birffday," so I assume it's 'er favver.

Monday 7 July 2008

Ronnie is winin' ter Peggy about Roxy not bein' able ter 'ave a look after 'erself, and she went missin' before for 5 days "off 'er Nanny Goat Race" on drugs. Jack interrupts wiv a dog and bone call. Phil phones up about a flat in Watford. Ben asks if 'e'd still spot gran, and why can't they go hammer and tack to live at the bloomin' Vic. Phil says it's time they 'ad their own 'ome. Ben goes ter see Peggy and says 'e will never be able ter dance again, and they are movin' ter Watford and 'e will never spot her again. Sean spots Max and taunts 'im about 'is ole lady makin' mugs out of boff of them. Sean says if 'e were in Max's place, havin' lost 'is ole lady and kids, he would cop revenge, right, "trust me, if I couldn't 'ave them, no-one could." Sean spots Ronnie and asks if she 'as 'eard from Roxy yet, and where she is, as 'e 'as been callin' 'er all night. Ronnie says she 'as 'ad no sleep eever, right, and they are boff in the same boat. She goes ter Jack's and 'e says she needn't 'ave 'urried, but 'e just wanted ter check she were Not so bad, right, Nanny Goat Race ter Nanny Goat Race. He says there 'as been a development and 'e wanted ter run it past 'er. He says 'e's movin' in wiv Tanya. Ronnie says, right, unconcerned, "is that it, eh? oh, right, well, congratulations." Jack says 'e wanted 'er ter hear it from 'im, not the bloody square gossip. Ronnie asks if 'e is doin' it for Tanya or ter get one over on Max. Jack says she knows 'im well enough - wot does she fink. I'll get out me spoons. Max drops 'is car off at the Arches and is there wen Peggy comes ter berate Phil for upsettin' Ben. She goes on "if Grant were 'ere." Phil points out that Grant 'as gone 'alf way round the world, she is complainin' about 'im movin' 'alf-way across London. He also tells 'er off for lyin' ter Ronnie, so she can 'ave evry geezer dancin' ter her wee tune. Sean arrives a bit later and asks Phil if 'e knows where 'is cousin is. Phil says 'e wouldn't know, init? Sean visits Peggy and asks after Roxy, right, and Peggy denies all knowledge. Max spots Ronnie in the square and invites 'er for a drink, right, ffen starts bitchin' about Jack. He says that Jack only cares about doin' a man dahn, right, and Ronnie says she asked Jack that too. Max says - wot else could account for 'is choice - 'ave a look at yer and 'ave a look at Tanya. Ronnie don't seem taken in by 'is sleazy chat up lines. Max says Tanya is tradin' up, same make, different model. Ronnie asks about Jack, and Max says that Jack found 'er a bit 'ard work, and Jack is used ter his 'ave a looks copping any cow, but she weren't so easy. Max says blokes like 'im 'ave ter work 'arder than blokes like Jack, and know more about 'ow ruddy ladies feel, wot they fink before they even fink it. Ronnie says icily "that works for yer does it?" Max gets even more flirtatious Ronnie mentions it's 'er birffday and 'e says 'e likes ter do sumfink special on 'is birffday, right, and leans in for a kiss. She is 'orrified and says it's 'er birffday, not 'is, woss it wiv the bloomin' Brannin' men! She tells 'im ter get out. Max asks Phil ter take an envelope of cash ter his sister - because Phil is gonna spot the flat near where she lives. Billy and 'oney 'ave some accommodation problem and need ter ask Peggy for somewhere ter stay, right, but wiv Phil leavin', Peggy invites 'im before 'e can even ask. Wen Peggy gets back, right, Ronnie is drinkin' vodka, and 'as clearly 'ad a bit already. Peggy asks 'ow bad it can be, and Ronnie says she were that close ter sleepin' wiv Max Brannin'. Peggy says they 'ave ter sort Roxy out, and then Sean. Ronnie says she 'as tried ter call Roxy Old Kent Roads of times, and Peggy says she will try. A wee later (and not necessarily 'avin' actually called) she 'ands Ronnie the address of Roxy's place in Dorset. Ronnie sulks in 'er room and refuses ter go wiv Peggy ter see Roxy, sayin' that Roxy don't need 'er big sister any more, init?Peggy says Roy don't know wot she wants, and they know wot she needs more than she does, so they should go and find 'er. Peggy leaves Billy and 'oney in charge of the Vic. Sean comes in and asks where Peggy and Ronnie are, and Billy tells 'im that 'e can't say, right, because it's orkward, she don't know they are comin'. I'll get out me spoons. Sean says 'oo and Billy tells 'im they 'ave gone gonna Roxy's. Peggy won't let Ronnie drive after all the bloomin' vodka and Ronnie says that Peggy 'asn't driven for many years, right, and this car is Roxy's pride and joy, do wot guvnor! Peggy crashes the gears and jerkily pulls oray at about 5mph.

Friday 4 July 2008

Sean is wotchin' TV loudly and Charlie can't sleep. He rants at Sean's lack of consideration, sayin' it's 'is 'ouse. Stacey mediates and Charlie says ter Stacey that she lets 'im cop oray wiv murder [he is bein' metaphorical, but Stacey gives it a 'ave a look.] In the cafe, right, Jack tells Sean ter crorl hammer and tack under 'is rock. He buys sumfink, wich Jane warns 'im is in aid of "gay pride," and she says she fought 'e were more macho, and 'e says cheerfully that 'e is confident of 'is sexuality. Jane says Tanya told 'im about wot 'e's doin' for 'er, and buyin' an 'ouse is pretty amazin'. At 'ome, Abi asks Tanya where Dad will live now, right, and Max arrives [why does she let 'im keep a key?] Max shouts at Tanya and refuses ter leave the bloody house wen she tells 'im ter get out. Later, Jack arrives and tells Tanya that it's all gahn ahead wiv Ruby. Tanya says it's a right big fin', and she'd 'ate 'im ter ffink 'e is obliged ter do it because of them, right, and she will pay as much as she can towards it, init?Jack says if she feels bad, she can rent it from 'im ter make it all above board. She kisses 'im. They cop right intimate and Jack is 'alf dressed wen Ronnie arrives. She is surprised ter see Tanya walks out in a dressin' gown, and says somewot bitterly that Jack didn't werete any time there. Jack says 'e's sorry she found out this way, and wot did she want, then, guv? She says she wanted 'elp trackin' dahn Roxy. He says no, he can't, but don't explain 'is real reason. Cor blimey guv! Tanya gets dressed and as she is leavin', Jack says 'e can't afford ter keep the chuffin' flat if 'e 'as bought the house, so can 'e move in wiv 'er, then, eh, squire? She is clearly surprised, and says they can rabbit and pork about it later. Cor blimey guv! She goes ter see Jane and says she don't know wot ter do now it is movin' so fast. Jane jokes "buy new sheets." Tanya says it's too soon. Jane says Jack is good for 'er, she is so 'appy, and she deserves it, and the girls will come 'round - and wot better ally against Max, isit? Bradley spots Max and starts ter talk, right, but Max tells 'im 'e don't want ter talk. Bradley goes ter Stacey and asks wot they're gonna do about Sean, he is a loose cannon - the bloomin' state of that girl last night, and wot will 'e do ter Tanya if 'e discovers about Jack, then? Stacey says they need ter send 'im oray, right, possibly ter Wee Mo's, maybe say they are gahn on 'oliday, and they can come hammer and tack quickly, right, leavin' 'im there, do wot guvnor! He goes ter the cafe and Max apologises for earlier and Bradley says 'e is busy this time. Stacey tells Sean and says she is hammer and tack wiv Bradley, right, and they are gonna Wee Mo's. Sean says 'e 'asn't seen 'er for ages. I'll get out me spoons. He goes ter the Vic, and Peggy is surly wen servin' 'im. Ronnie arrives and asks where the incubator is (Roxy). Ronnie says she ain't in the mood, and she wouldn't let Sean wivin a mile of 'er any road, init?Sean is angry, and Peggy frows 'im out. Vinnie and Shirley are gonna go on 'oliday wiv the bonus, and Shirley is sposed ter arrange it, and eh says ter Ricky that 'e can't wait ter get Shirley alone, oray from 'eaffer. He buys an 'orrific fong and shows it ter Peggy. Then 'eaffer arrives wiv Shirley and they discuss the holiday, right, and clearly are boff gahn. Vinnie is disappointed. Sean rabbit and porks ter Stacey and she tells 'im about gonna the address she found in 'is jeans, and seein' the bloody lass all beaten up. He asks why and she says there were all that blood, right, not yors, right, and she were afraid the chuffin' bobbies might be after 'im. He says 'e can't remember anyfink about wot 'appened, just bein' there. Max goes ter the bloomin' Vic and spots Jack and tells 'im 'e 'as bitten off more than 'e can chew, right, and 'e 'as 'ad Suzy on the chuffin' dog and bone, their sister, and she is skint, so Jack can bail 'er out since 'e is so Old Kent Roaded. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? Jack says 'e did it last time, right, and all 'is brass is tied up elsewhere now. Tanya arrives and Jack says 'e don't want ter push 'er into anyfink, he can stay put where 'e is and find sumfink cheaper. Tanya replies, smilin', right, that 'e 'as ter promise ter put the rubbish out, and tread carefully wiv the girls, and wait until Lauren comes hammer and tack to tell them, right? Jack is pleased. They walks out and she tells 'im ter nip 'ome and cop an overnight bag, right, and they kiss in the street. Sean 'appens ter be 'ave a lookin' out of the bleedin' window at the time. Tanya tells Abi that Uncle Jack is comin' ter dinner and she tries ter broach the bloody subject of Uncle Jack maybe livin' wiv them, since 'e 'as 'elped so much wiv the chuffin' house. Stacey arrives and warns Tanya that Sean is 'round, and ter stay oray. Tanya says she seen him yesterday and she finks 'e knows. She goes ter the chuffin' kitchen and spots the back door open and shuts it, 'ave a lookin' worried. Then Abi walks in, and Tanya jumps, init? Max goes ter see Bradley and wines that 'e knows 'e 'as done bad fings, but Jack will weasel 'is way in wiv 'is children, right, and 'e 'as nowhere ter go now that Jack 'as gazumped 'im. Bradley tells Stacey that Max is 'omeless and 'e is gonna ask 'im ter come and live 'ere, right, and Stacey Sean goes ter see Jack, right, and says Jack lied about Tanya, right, and Jack says 'e and Tanya were over a long time ago, right, and wot about Roxy, she is pregnant wiv 'is kid, she is the real deal, right, why ain't 'e chasin' 'er? Sean appears ter agree, and as 'e leaves, Jack says don't go after Ronnie, right, she don't know where Roxy is. Sean don't believe 'im until Jack explains that Ronnie came ter ask 'im ter find Roxy for 'er. Sean goes ter see Ronnie and tells 'er that 'e will be waitin' wen Roxy comes hammer and tack to spot her. In the Vic, Peggy answers the bleedin' dog and bone, and puts it dahn quickly, sayin' don't call 'ere, right, and then Phil and Ronnie ball of chalk in. Ronnie asks if that were Roxy on the dog and bone and Peggy says wrong number. Wen Ronnie leaves, right, Phil wispers that she is unbelievable - 'e 'eard 'er, right, and why don't she just tell Ronnie where Roxy is, then, squire?

Thursday 3 July 2008

Stacey and Jean ask Sean 'oo did this ter him and say 'e needs ter go ter hospital. He refuses and Stacey tries ter mop up the bloomin' blood and tidy the bloomin' blood off 'is Nanny Goat Race. She asks why 'e didn't answer 'er calls, right? Then she suddenly realises that 'is Nanny Goat Race underneaff all the bloody blood ain't cut, right, so the bloomin' blood ain't 'is. He is silent and jumps up and walks off. Cor blimey guv! Stacey goes over ter Bradley and tells 'im the bloody story about the mystery blood. Vinnie cooks breakfast for Shirley and Ricky at the bloomin' Vic. Ricky asks if they fink they are takin' advantage of Peggy (and eatin' 'is eggs). As they argue over the bleedin' breakfast, and end up wiv it on the bloomin' floor, they 'ere a ooh-woo and Peggy walks in. She turns 'er nose up at the bacon and egg on the bloody floor. Shirley says she never expected them 'ome so early. Ben asks why Max is sleepin' in 'is bed. Peggy says "listen 'ere, right, yer" ter Shirley, right, and tells 'er ter put the mockers on wearin' 'er dressin' gown and cop dressed. Right. Peggy is 'appy wiv the takings so pays Shirley £200 but says next time she will keep 'er wardrobe locked, init?Phil tells Max that 'e's sorry, but 'e needs the bleedin' bedroom back. A wee later, Phil discovers that Ben is gonna dance lessons and shouts at Peggy for lyin' ter him and interferin' and naggin'. She says Not so bad, if 'e 'ates 'er so much, right, move out, he is a middle-aged man livin' wiv 'is mum. Jase and Dorn move into the bleedin' B&B. Ted arrives ter see Jean and Charlie cheerfully invites 'im in and gives 'im tea. He drinks it waitin' for Jean, and 'e 'ave a looks at the drainin' board and moves the cups into a more symmetrical pattern. Ted asks after Sean, right, and Stacey arrives and says now ain't a good time. Jean is upset wen 'e 'as gone, and tells Stacey 'ow upset she is that she frew 'im out. Stacey says she did Ted a favour, and 'ow would Sean react seein' 'is muvver wiv a strange man right now, she is worried about it, luv? Sean comes dahn and Stacey asks 'im wot 'appened, and Sean says 'e were out of it, right, he don't recall, and 'e says 'e don't care about anyfink any more. Bianca and Witney set up the new TV and Pat is cross, sayin' that they shouldn't 'ave unpacked it, right, they 'ave ter send it back. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? Bianca says 'er guardian angel wants 'er ter have it. Max goes ter Tanya's (soon ter be 'is) 'ouse and says 'e is stayin' because 'e 'ad ter leave the chuffin' Vic. Yer can't 'ave a knees-up wivout a joanna. At the salon, Jack offers Tanya the name of a solicitor. Tanya says Max is clever, he knows she won't disrupt the kids and their schoolin', but she can't stand livin' under the same roof as 'im. Jack offers 'er 'is flat ter stay in, and she says no, it's too soon. He says 'e would move out. However, wen Tanya goes ter the cafe, right, Jane offers 'er a place ter stay. Sean walks in, right, and asks Tanya if she missed 'im, and she replies smugly "why, did yer go somewhere?" Stacey 'ave a looks in Sean's pockets and finds an address and Bradley takes 'er there. It's an empty, scruffy and tatty flat, do wot guvnor! A beaten up girl arrives 'ome and asks wot they are doin' so they make an 'asty exit, do wot guvnor! Max spots Jack and smugly says that it's 'is 'ouse and 'is kids, and there is nuffink Jack can do about it. Jack 'ave a looks foughtful, and is obviously plannin' ter do sumfink. Yer can't 'ave a knees-up wivout a joanna. He is there wiv Tanya and Abi wen Max arrives and Abi runs ter him. Tanya tells Abi ter go ter her room wile she rabbit and porks ter Max, init?She shouts at Max that it's not right 'e come and destroy evryfink. I'll get out me spoons. She tells Abi ter get ready, they are leavin'. Abi wants ter stay at 'ome wiv Max. Jack makes a call, right, and 'ave a looks 'appy. Meanwile, right, Tanya shouts at Max in 'er kitchen. Jack says 'e 'as just called Ruby and 'e's buyin' the bloomin' house now. Phil packs ter leave the bleedin' Vic, and frows oray Ben's dance shoes. Ronnie arrives and asks where Roxy is, right, but no-one seems ter know

Tuesday 1 July 2008

Tuesday 1 July 2008 Mickey makes a life-changin' decision but it remains ter be seen weffer Keiff will follow whistle and flute. Shirley and 'eaffer arrange a rub-a-dub quiz in an attempt ter recover Vinnie's financial losses. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The chuffin' revoltin' Millers are asleep in the bloody Masood's lounge. Mickey and Keiff argue over dirty kit and Keiff nickin' evry geezer's tidy fings. Mickey 'ave a looks in Keiff's kit bag for the kit Keiff 'as taken, right, and finds a letter from Darren's muvver, offerin' Keiff a Uncle Bob. They argue about 'im not bovverin' ter dog and bone ffem back. Keiff lies about phonin' for the Uncle Bob, right, and evry geezer knows 'e's lyin' and Mickey says 'e will dog and bone to take the bleedin' Uncle Bob if Keiff won't, he 'as nuffink ter keep 'im 'ere. Keiff says 'e will try 'arder, right, and Mickey says 'e 'as sat on 'is backside and lived off the social all 'is life, and 'e keeps makin' promises but nuffink comes of it. The chuffin' Uncle Bob were a chance ter provide for 'is family, right, but no. They 'ave no 'ome, no socks, no bed, he 'asn't even got a photo of 'is daughter, wot would it take ter make Keiff DO sumfink, mate? Tanya broaches the subject of Uncle Jack wiv Abi, and says they are boychina and girlmate. Abi runs out screamin'. Max arrives later, wen Jack is there and Max says 'e is 'ere ter apologise. Jack says sceptically "right?" Max says 'e is movin' hammer and tack to the chuffin' square for 'is kids. Jack says it's good of 'im ter visit, but 'e's sure Max is busy. Max says 'e needs a private word wiv 'is ole lady. Jack says if Max steps out of line, right, Jack will pay 'im a visit. He leaves, and Max tells Tanya that 'e wants ter see 'is kids. She finks it's just a trick ter take the chuffin' kids. Abi visits Max and says she wants 'im 'ome. Max takes a dog and bone call and wen 'e gets back, he tells Abi that evryfink will be not so bad, right, he 'as sorted it. Bianca's mestery presents continue - wiv a large TV arrivin'. Vinnie bets the bloody takings from Shirley's special night and loses. Shirley arranges a quiz night, as Peggy will be hammer and tack soon and she needs ter have made some brass. Shirley tells 'eaffer ter get some questions. Old Mo 'as porned Brenda's 'orn, right, and spent the brass on some dodgy goods (a bit of toasters) ter sell but Brenda is comin' hammer and tack to collect it soon, right, and they 'aven't got the cash ter get it back. They decide ter enter the rub-a-dub quiz. Brenda arrives early, wile they are arguin' about 'oo will be in the team (no-one wants to). Bradley gets a mate from work ter come, but 'e 'as a car accident on the way. At Jean's, right, Ted arrives and 'e says 'e's quite right good at quizzes, right, and Jean says she 'ates questions. Ted says Not so bad, and Jean says 'e right wants ter go don't 'e - she wouldn't 'ave ter answer any questions. The bloomin' Millers decide ter enter the bloody rub-a-dub quiz as it will be Mickey's last night before 'e goes ter ffeir muvver's for the Uncle Bob. Keiff mopes and says ter Dorn that 'e 'ad been 'opin' the bloody letter were ter offer 'im anuvver chance, and 'e luvs 'er, and Dorn replies sharply it's a shame 'e never showed it. Keiff sits at Mrs Masood's and sulks instead of gonna the bloody pub. He tells 'er nastily that 'e is sick of 'er comments about 'is personal 'ygiene problems. He lets 'er tidy 'im up, he 'as an 'aircut, and a shave, alffough 'e leaves a strange wee bit of fluff in the bleedin' middle of 'is chin, for no apparent reason, and 'e goes ter the bleedin' Vic ter apologise ter Mickey and say 'e will go ter ffeir muvver's after all. Max arrives at Tanya's and says 'e 'as found a place ter live - 'ere. Ruby were sellin' and she offered 'im first refusal, right, and 'e 'as bought it. The bloomin' quiz starts and 'eaffer reads out the first round of "General Knowledge" questions, all about famous generals. Shirley snotches the chuffin' clip board and says round two is 'ers, and asks questions about the human body. Shirley delays the quiz rounds and says it's 'appy 'our. The Slaters and Pat's team 'ave ter make a tie break, and it's 'ow many market stalls there are, wich o'course Bradley knows so they win, and Charlie goes ter fetch the horn (they told Brenda it were bein' tidyed). Brenda is on 'er way out by the time Charlie gets back. Stacey thanks Bradley for 'elpin' 'er family wiv a kiss. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? As they wait at the bar, Sean asks for a drink and Stacey 'ave a looks at 'im, horrified, right, as 'e is covered in dirt and blood and 'ave a looks like 'e's just come from a fight